Monday, June 2, 2014

Currently. Keeping On

Thinking about: Oh, life. I don't even know where to start.

Things are busy, stressful, and slow all at the same time. The house hasn't sold, so we just paid rent and our mortgage and man, that hurts. It hurts a lot. We're squeaking by, we have enough, but only just. Saturday I found myself wallowing in self pity. Ray and I don't go on dates or eat out, ever. I need a haircut, I'm wearing old clothes that don't fit, and so is Emmett. I want to do a million things to the rental to make it feel more like home. I want to take Emmett to Sea World for his birthday. None of that is going to change any time soon, and I was feeling really sorry for myself about it all. Then Ray came home from the store with enormous mason jars and filled them with margaritas, and all was well with the world again. Sometimes you just need cute new glasses and a drink to set things right.

We are tired. We're weary from the work at the house and from watching our bank accounts drained each month. We are ready for things to be normal again. One home to worry about. Weekends together. A little extra money to save and to have fun with. I'm ready to feel free to leave my house without fear of spending money (this is self-imposed fear. Ray doesn't make me stay at home all the time, I'm just so worried that if I go out I'll end up at a Target or Starbucks or be tempted to spend money somehow.) We're ready for a change.

Emmett talks non-stop. He says words like hummingbird and submarine and his voice is so sweet it breaks my heart. He sings. Yesterday I caught him singing Winnie the Pooh's exercise song while he played with his airplanes. He does the head, shoulders, knees and toes dance and sings along with the song. He's so smart and funny and sweet. I'm so proud of him.

He and I are in a nice rhythm. We're used to being home together now and we both love it. I'm a better mama to him now. I've let go of a lot of my selfishness with him. I don't put pressure on myself to keep the house spotless and plan perfect meals for the week. I'm enjoying just being with him, riding our bikes if it's not too hot outside and swimming in the afternoons when it is too hot outside. It's peaceful and nice and I love that boy so much.

I've figured out a nice rhythm with work too. That job I was so scared of has turned out to be a huge blessing and I really love it so far. God knows, and He's providing for us little by little. Not having extra money is wearing on me, but it's also been really good for me. I see that and appreciate that and I know God is teaching me. Life is good and full.

Also, I started a diet today so y'all pray for me. My name is Anna Kate and I'm addicted to bread.

Reading: Rebus again. I know, I have a problem.

Watching: I'm slightly ashamed to admit it, but I'm binge-watching Suits and I don't hate it. People have been telling me they love that show for months, but I was dead set against watching it. Then one day during Emmett's nap I couldn't think of anything to watch (I'd just finished Nashville. *tears*), so Suits it was. It started out not horrible, and then got better and better over time. I'm currently a few episodes into season 2 and it's definitely keeping me entertained while I work during nap times.

He loves to play with my brushes in the morning while I get ready.

Such a weirdo. He thinks my underwear drawer is actually full of "tank shirts" for him.
How we get through hot days:






Wishing: Oh, so many things.
1. Get caught up on The 52 Project. I'm two weeks behind I think. I've all but given up on this blog but I'm not letting go that easy!
2. Meal plan!
3. Work out, at least 4 days this week.

That's enough for one week, right? ;)


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2 comments:

  1. I love all of your photos! Your little boy is just adorable!!!

    My wish list is very similar to yours this week!

    Hugs to you... I hope you sell your place soon and won't have to spend double rent and mortgage!
    Stopping by from the Currently link up--Choose Happy

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