I'm Back?

It's been a really long time since I've blogged. It's been a long time since I've even opened blogger to look at my blog. Since I'm working from home, all my old blogging time has been taken up with work, and when I do have a spare minute, it's hard to want to open my computer again. I write for one of my jobs, so writing is almost the last thing I want to do in my down time.

Also, I started to question the reasons behind my blogging. I began to realize that I don't care so much about how many people are following me, or how many comments I get on each post. I stopped looking at my blogger stats and sort of lost interest in the blogging "game." I realized that this blog is really for me most of all, as an outlet for me to talk about my life and my family and let out the thoughts that twirl around my head all day. So instead of just changing things up, I gave up on it all together.

Also, I don't always have a lot to say. Now that I'm staying home with Emmett, our life is so much less complicated. Sometimes, we stay at home for weeks at a time. We don't go out much, so I don't often feel like I have anything exciting to share. I have my daily anxieties, but our day to day is simple, and very laid back. In the very best way for us. I started to feel like my weekly Currently posts were the same each week- nothing had changed from Monday to Monday, so I felt silly writing those posts (and making you read them!)

So, those are the reasons I've been M.I.A. the last few months. Why am I back now? I'm not sure. I've had things on my mind that I want to get out, and I have new things to share and process. I received some encouragement from family and friends over the last few weeks to start up again, so I thought I would give it a try. I can't promise regular posts, certainly not scheduled recipe posts or link-ups, but I'll write when I have something to write about and if no one ever reads, that'll be okay.

This summer has been a crazy one. After lots of anxiety and a couple of tough months financially, our house finally sold. We spent three weeks in Georgia in July and August, where Emmett soaked up all the attention from my family and I did a lot of relaxing. We had an awesome week at the beach, where I spent every waking moment searching for shark's teeth and Emmett spent every waking moment asking to go in the water. Ray got to come too, which was so nice. It's great for all of us to spend time with my family, and we miss them an awful lot when we leave again. Now we're back in the desert, Emmett is back in school in a new classroom with a new teacher, and he's taking the changes like a champ.

Speaking of Emmett.. I am just so proud of that boy. He's so good! Ray and I talk all the time about how good he is, how sweet he is, and how smart he is. He blows me away with the way he adapts to new situations, the way he learns and grows all the time. I love him so much, and feel so lucky to be able to spend all my time with him. I'm the luckiest mama.

More later, I'm sure. ;)

P.S. If you think about it, say a prayer for us tomorrow afternoon. More on that later, too.

Currently. Keeping On

Thinking about: Oh, life. I don't even know where to start.

Things are busy, stressful, and slow all at the same time. The house hasn't sold, so we just paid rent and our mortgage and man, that hurts. It hurts a lot. We're squeaking by, we have enough, but only just. Saturday I found myself wallowing in self pity. Ray and I don't go on dates or eat out, ever. I need a haircut, I'm wearing old clothes that don't fit, and so is Emmett. I want to do a million things to the rental to make it feel more like home. I want to take Emmett to Sea World for his birthday. None of that is going to change any time soon, and I was feeling really sorry for myself about it all. Then Ray came home from the store with enormous mason jars and filled them with margaritas, and all was well with the world again. Sometimes you just need cute new glasses and a drink to set things right.

We are tired. We're weary from the work at the house and from watching our bank accounts drained each month. We are ready for things to be normal again. One home to worry about. Weekends together. A little extra money to save and to have fun with. I'm ready to feel free to leave my house without fear of spending money (this is self-imposed fear. Ray doesn't make me stay at home all the time, I'm just so worried that if I go out I'll end up at a Target or Starbucks or be tempted to spend money somehow.) We're ready for a change.

Emmett talks non-stop. He says words like hummingbird and submarine and his voice is so sweet it breaks my heart. He sings. Yesterday I caught him singing Winnie the Pooh's exercise song while he played with his airplanes. He does the head, shoulders, knees and toes dance and sings along with the song. He's so smart and funny and sweet. I'm so proud of him.

He and I are in a nice rhythm. We're used to being home together now and we both love it. I'm a better mama to him now. I've let go of a lot of my selfishness with him. I don't put pressure on myself to keep the house spotless and plan perfect meals for the week. I'm enjoying just being with him, riding our bikes if it's not too hot outside and swimming in the afternoons when it is too hot outside. It's peaceful and nice and I love that boy so much.

I've figured out a nice rhythm with work too. That job I was so scared of has turned out to be a huge blessing and I really love it so far. God knows, and He's providing for us little by little. Not having extra money is wearing on me, but it's also been really good for me. I see that and appreciate that and I know God is teaching me. Life is good and full.

Also, I started a diet today so y'all pray for me. My name is Anna Kate and I'm addicted to bread.

Reading: Rebus again. I know, I have a problem.

Watching: I'm slightly ashamed to admit it, but I'm binge-watching Suits and I don't hate it. People have been telling me they love that show for months, but I was dead set against watching it. Then one day during Emmett's nap I couldn't think of anything to watch (I'd just finished Nashville. *tears*), so Suits it was. It started out not horrible, and then got better and better over time. I'm currently a few episodes into season 2 and it's definitely keeping me entertained while I work during nap times.

He loves to play with my brushes in the morning while I get ready.

Such a weirdo. He thinks my underwear drawer is actually full of "tank shirts" for him.

How we get through hot days:

Wishing: Oh, so many things.
1. Get caught up on The 52 Project. I'm two weeks behind I think. I've all but given up on this blog but I'm not letting go that easy!
2. Meal plan!
3. Work out, at least 4 days this week.

That's enough for one week, right? ;)

Hi there! Welcome to Currently, where we share with each other what we are Currently up to and let you share your post through the link-up below. We love this link-up, where we can make new friends and build community. Join us.

Thinking about:

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Thankful for:

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CURRENTLY LINK-UP RULES

1. Link your Currently post below! Entries unrelated to the theme will be deleted.

2. Link back to this site so others can join on this adventure with us. You can grab the button below:

3. The link up starts on Mondays, but you can join any day of the week!

4. *THE MOST IMPORTANT RULE* We are each here to encourage each other and build a community of women and friends. :) Comment on the blog post directly before yours to help support and get to know each other. If you do not do this, your post will be deleted from the link-up.

If you are interested in co-hosting, please email Jenna at info(at)amamacollective(dot)com to get on the list!

Here’s the template for you to copy and paste and do a post as well — link up with us below!

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An InLinkz Link-up

Happy Days

Things have been pretty bleak on the blog this Summer, but life is good and happy and free these days so I want to share a little bit about that with y'all today.

First of all, the weather in AZ has started to cool. Don't go crazy, it's still in the 90's during the day but the low 90's is so so so much better than anything over 100, so I'm ecstatic. Like, really happy. We've eaten dinner outside a few times the last few days and in the afternoons I can let Emmett outside to play on the patio while I do dishes or sweep the floors. Oh my gosh he loves to be outside! It's such a relief to finally be able to let him play outside. He comes in and out through the doggy door, which he thinks is hilarious and I think is pretty strange and maybe awful now that I'm telling you about it. But that way I don't have to lose our precious AC and can keep the flies out, but he's free to come and go as he pleases.

It's win-win, since I can actually get things done, and he's happy and tantrum free. Oh glorious weather! It won't actually feel like Fall here until after Halloween, but any drop in degrees makes me a happy happy camper.

Our new schedule is wonderful so far. I can't tell you how much I love spending my afternoons at home with Emmett. I leave work at noon, pick Emmett up from "school", and we eat a quick lunch together. Then we cuddle before his nap. While he sleeps I read or clean or nap, and then we cuddle again while he wakes up. All this cuddling is just what we both need. It warms my heart and I can tell he's more peaceful and secure after spending that time together. This is what I've been missing the last year!

Things are so much more peaceful now. I am able to be truly present to him, for hours each day. I feel peaceful. Like I'm finally right where I'm supposed to be. It feels so good to give so much more of myself to my baby boy. This is the motherhood I've been missing, craving, needing. I am so grateful.

Things have been hard lately, really hard. But it's starting to turn around. I can already feel the positives that have come from the tough things our little family has had to endure. We're stronger, closer, more in love than we were. We know now that no matter what this life throws at us, we'll get through it together and come out okay. I appreciate my husband and my little Emmett more than ever, and feel so so blessed to have them.

So things are good. Beautiful, peaceful, sunny and warm (not hot). I am blessed, and so happy.

P.S. I'm trying these out for a little snack before dinner tonight. I'll let you know how they turn out!

Working Mom Gets Her Wish

Linking up with Corinna, keeping it real as real gets.

I've complained enough about work on this blog for ya'll to know that I've struggled a lot with work this Summer. This year, really. I struggle every day with leaving Emmett at home with someone else for most of his day, and most days it's been really hard.

Ray and I have talked and talked about what to do, if anything. We needed my income, so I had to work, but I've been desperate for some other way to make it work. Some way to be able to spend more time with Emmett while still helping to provide for my family. We thought and prayed and struggled through each day, but no solution presented itself.

Then a couple of weeks ago I started spotting, and thought I was losing my baby. I called in to work and let my boss know, and he told me to take a few days off to rest, they would all pitch in and take care of my work for me. I took three days off, and then headed to Georgia for Labor Day weekend. When I came back to work last week, my boss called me in to a meeting to tell me they were cutting my hours back from 40+ to 20 hours a week. They said they needed to save money, and I guess they realized while I was gone that they could survive without me. After the shock wore off, I found myself feeling totally relieved. I felt the stress and pressure I'd been dealing with all Summer just lift off my shoulders, and I relaxed, for the first time in months. This was an answer to prayer.

I told Ray and he and his family jumped in to action. They looked at our house and the comps in the neighborhood and realized that we can sell it, after years of being under water, for what my husband paid for it. My in-laws offered to let us move in with them to save money until we decide what to do next. Not ideal, but definitely do-able for a time. We felt peaceful by the end of the day, and I still felt relieved.

Things still seem to be pretty weird at work and there is a lot to work out, but I hope in the end this all ends up being a blessing in disguise. Already I've loved spending my afternoons at home with Emmett, and I've been able to rest and take care of myself while we try to figure out if baby number 2 is going to be okay.

I've been going to the doctor for blood work every couple of days, and so far my HCG levels continue to rise, so little baby seems to be doing okay. We have an ultrasound on Friday, and I'm desperately looking forward to seeing that tiny little heartbeat. My spotting turned to full-on bleeding over the weekend so it's been hard not to panic and worry and stress, but I feel peaceful too. I have faith that God gave me this little baby for a reason, and I know He's taking care of us.

The thing is, as I sit here tonight, very obviously coming down with a cold, pregnant and bleeding and half as employed as I was last week, I feel peace. I should feel discouraged, under attack, and anxious. There is fear, and worry, and hurt and so much still to be determined, but mostly there is peace.

I know everything will turn out as it's supposed to, and I know I would do anything for my family, and for this little tiny baby struggling to grow inside me. I am a wife, and a mother, and that's all I ever wanted to be.

Keepin' It Real Y'all

Linkin up with Track 8! Have y'all entered Corinna's Freshly Picked giveaway yet??

Today was a long and exhausting and rough day for all of us. By the time we got home from work, no one wanted to cook, so we threw in the towel and went out for burgers. We try really hard to make sure Emmett eats well balanced, healthy meals, but tonight, we just didn't have it in us. He shared our burgers, fries, and even some ranch dressing.

Part of me was mortified. All I could think is What must all these people think of us! Any second someone is going to walk up to our table and call us out. "How old is that baby!", I kept hearing them say in my head. "French fries?! Are you kidding!?" Instead everyone in the tables around us just oohed and aahed and chatted with him while he played with his food. The rest of me was just relieved to be sitting down to a meal as a family that we didn't have to work for. We'll give him an extra helping of veggies tomorrow!

Some days we just do what we can to survive, and we pat ourselves on the back for getting through the day.

Happy Friday!

I was ready early this morning, so Emmett and I spent half an hour outside before I went to work. What a fun way to start my Friday! The weather was cool, or at least it wasn't super hot, so we walked and walked and walked around the neighborhood. Emmett is happiest just walking around outside, and I'm happiest watching him be happy. I'm thinking about waking up early every day now!

Anyway it was a really nice morning and not a terrible day, and now it's the weekend so woohoo! I hope ya'll have a great weekend!! 

Life Is Good!

Things are good right now y'all. 

Not perfect, never perfect, but good. Work is slowing down, and I see an end to the busy season in sight. Yesterday we got some rain and the temperature never hit 90. We had dinner outside for the first time all Summer. Such a treat! And Emmett, oh Emmett. He's at a really great age right now. 

The last couple of weeks he's really changed and grown up. All of a sudden there's a little boy walking around our house, talking and laughing and interacting with us. He's a little human with a little (big) personality, and we're loving it so much. He seems bigger and taller this week too! It's crazy how that happens every couple of months.

Some new things he's doing lately:

• Reading. Devouring books, all day every day!
• Animal sounds. Cows, dogs, cats, ducks, and more and more dogs. Our house sounds like a zoo!
• Walking better and faster and steadier each day.
• Talking! He says mama and daddy and up, and making so many noises, having conversations with himself and with us. He's able to tell us what he wants and needs now.
• Reaching for me when I come in the door. He runs to me and reaches his little arms toward me. It's awesome!
• Sleeping through the night! Okay, it only happened twice, and he's been waking up at 5 every day, but he's never slept straight through before so I'll take it!

Every night Ray and I go on and on about how much we love that little boy and how great he is. We're smitten and so proud of him. 

So anyway I'm feeling good and life is good and it's nice to feel this way. It's been a long tough Summer but things are peaceful and joyful and sweet and I'm content. 

Last Weekend: Justin Timberlake & Jay Z at the Rosebowl!!!

OH MY GOSH YOU GUYS I SAW JT!!

Last weekend I took my first girls' trip since Emmett was born. My sisters, our friend Rachel and I drove to Pasadena for a JT & Jay Z concert. It. Was. Amazing.

Our weekend, in iPhone pictures:

Playin in some puddles before saying our goodbyes. :(

Goodbyes are the worst!

Quick Starbucks run on our way out of town! Green teas for everyone!

I sent selfies to Ray and Emmett all day erryday so Emmett wouldn't know I was gone.

Windmills in Palm Springs.

The beach!! Crescent Beach in Laguna Beach, CA.

All the single (and married) ladies!

Post-picnic, pre-concert posed shot. Love these girls!

Somebody's happy to be at the Rose Bowl! Isn't she cute?

We be on our suit and tie!

Please excuse that enormous beer in my hand. Waiting for the show to start!

We had such a good time! I missed my boys so much, but mama needed a weekend away. The show was amazing and now we're all dying to see JT on his own when he's here in Phoenix in December. More JT please!

Keepin' It Real: Rainy Days

I'm linking up with Corinna over at Track 8 (a day late!) for Keepin' It Real Mondays!

Over the weekend we FINALLY got some rain! It was so amazing. Emmett loved the rain, and loved the mud even more! I grew up in Georgia, where it rains almost every afternoon in the Summer, so I played in the mud all the time as a kid. I have so many happy memories of making mud pies and running around barefoot in the wet grass. So fun!

I feel so bad for little Emmett being stuck in the house all Summer, living in this desert with hardly any grass to speak of. So when it rained and the temperature finally cooled off, I let him outside to play in the mud to his little heart's content! He was one dirty, happy little boy!

Splashing in the puddles!

Mom, I'm gonna eat this rock. 

Mom, I'm really gonna eat this rock.

No Emmett, no! Don't eat that rock! 

Ahhh I'm just kidding.

The best.